Things I Consumed / Did in the Past Weeks Vol. 2

So we're officially in the mid of April. I've broken my own promise to regularly write, which is a shame. [Insert THAT "Shame! Shame!" scene from Game of Thrones here] Is it just me or does time really go by so fast the more you grow up and moreover ever since the pandemic hit? I've been working from home since mid March last year, with still no plan for working from office in hindsight, and time is getting more and more of a blurry concept for me. Feelings like "Was it 2 months or just 3 weeks ago I started using this skincare product?" "Is it Thursday already?" is starting to appear almost on daily basis. Might as well just say that time is a concept I start struggling to grasp.

So, what have I discovered in the past weeks?

1. This cool global vaccination tracker by Reuters. It gives you insights on the current progress of COVID-19 vaccination in each country that has commenced the process. You can also get insights and graphs for each of the country (e.g. active cases, vaccination speed, vaccination phase etc). Kudos to Reuters data team.
2. The Irregulars on Netflix. They just released in mid March and I'm still on episode 4. The premise of this series is that Sherlock Holmes and dr. Watson, the already-famous and respectable crime detective duo, turned to five teenagers to help them solve some darker cases. Do not expect regular murder cases in this, expect something more like "murdered by an unseen force" kind of cases. I once read that in the Victorian era, where the series is supposed to take place, due to the lack of entertainment, seances are one of the most common "entertainment" people could get their hands on. Makes you feel damn lucky to be born in this era, huh?
3. Somethinc Game Changer Tripeptide Eye Concentrate Gel. Riding into my thirties, I know very wel that eye cream should've been a staple for my skincare routine--and I do incorporate it starting this year. TBH I don't expect much for any of the eye treatment product I bought--I did my research and dark circles are not that easy to get rid of and some even can't be gone due to genetics factor. Hence, every time I bought eye treatment product, I only aim for it to be the moisturizing agent for my eye area, since the drier it gets, the more wrinkles you'll have. If this product turns out to also be helpful in vanishing my dark circle, I would count it as a bonus. 
4. Around end of March I had another bizarre dream. It no longer comes as a surprise for me, since it's become quite a habit ever since the pandemic hit. (Apparently I'm not alone--NatGeo has even written an article about it, complete with the scientific reason, that I've read since). The dream involved me and him, and his dad, stranded(?) in an airport. His dad took off, leaving only me and him in the crowded airport. We got separated mid-way, and I managed to get out of the airport. Guess what I saw the moment I set my foot out the airport? Dago area. BCA Dago junction to be exact. The city was so advanced that they even had roller coaster as one of their modes of transportation and their MRT has transparent track. And guess what city I turned out to be in? I was stranded in an airport in Santiago, Chile. The End.
5. In the same week, only a few days apart, came along another strange dream. It involved 2012-era 1D (guess I'd been watching too many videos of them and listened too much of their songs) and myself. In the dream, they were about to shoot their latest music video, which was What Makes You Beautiful, in Bogor. Yep, our freaking Bogor, West Java, Indonesia. The set was located in some mountainous area in Bogor in the middle of some old kingdom ruins (I know, it was as bizarre as that). Highlight of the dream: Harry Styles taught me how to dance. Do not picture current hot-and-pretty Harry Styles in mind, but this one was 2012, cute, curly-haired Harry Styles. The End.

That's all for now. Hopefully I'll manage to come up with another list exactly next week!

Things I Consumed / Did in the Past Weeks Vol. 1

Since I feel like I've slowly lost my ability to do writing (hell, even my vocabulary has gotten worse each day!), I've pledged myself to start regularly updating this page by writing down what I consumed/did and/or what weird dreams I had the past weeks. (Will try to do it biweekly, but hopefully committed enough to do it weekly). 

Disclaimer: This list is inspired by Haley Nahman, ex-Man Repeller (RIP) deputy editor whose weekly newsletter, Maybe Baby, I subscribed to. In the newsletter, she listed "15 Things I Consumed Last Week." 

So, here goes the first edition of Things I Consumed / Did in the Past Weeks.

1. Learning Spanish in Duolingo. I've heard about the app since around 2 years ago, and some of the people I know swear by it since they claimed it makes learning new language so easy. So I decided to download the app with the intention of learning new language (duh). Accent-related videos are the kind of videos I watch on YouTube and only knowing 2 languages certainly doesn't reflect the level of linguist I kind of aspire to be. Anyway, I downloaded the app and was torn between learning French or Spanish at first, but then I remember I took French class in college and it was embarrassing--the only phrases I still memorize now other than 'Au revoir' is 'Quelle heure est-il?' (I even still need to Google how to write the latter phrase.) So, I decided that Spanish, it is. It was going well, and now by writing this I just remember I haven't continued the lesson for days. Sorry, Duolingo, I'll get back to you tonight.
2. Lots and lots of One Direction videos on YouTube. Yes, THAT One Direction, 1D or whatever you call it. The biggest boyband in the mid 2010s. I can't remember what dragged me into the YouTube rabbit hole of their videos, but now, 3 weeks passed by, and the algorithm in my YouTube home feeds have (almost) completely changed to all 1D-related videos. I never hated them, I knew all of their hit songs since they all seemed to be playing nonstop on the radio back then, and quite frankly I enjoyed their songs. But that was it--never even thought to follow them on social media. (I just started following Harry Styles on Instagram since I loved his first solo album that it was constantly on the loop in my car and Dunkirk was magnificent.) But now, fast forward 5 years later since they announced their "hiatus", I found myself following both Louis Tomlinson and Harry Styles on Instagram. And on Twitter too for Louis. Not a big fan of the Larry Stylinson theory, though. 
3. Louis Tomlinson's Walls album. It's currently on repeat. TBH Louis is my favorite 1D member, yes, fight me. He might be seen as the weakest in 1D, but I think it was more due to his raspy voice that might not quite fit the type of 1D pop songs. Now that he released his first debut album (well, it was released last year), I feel like the music fit his voice well. Some tracks kind of remind me of the 90s Britpop songs I used to listen to in Hard Rock FM while driving to campus, and, additionally, Liam Gallagher was even credited as one of the lyricists in one of the songs. Louis said this album was heavily influenced by the music he listened to growing up (he mentioned Oasis a lot, also Arctic Monkeys and Amy Winehouse), and it was indeed reflected in it. Well, not in all songs, but in some of the best ones IMO. I discovered that he was due to have a concert in Jakarta in June this year, which I'm really eager to go, but seeing the circumstances, I bet it would be rescheduled or even cancelled. 
4. Cycling. Been doing it for almost 5 months or so now in the pursuit of a healthier lifestyle approaching the dirty thirty of age. So far I'm still enjoying it since I got to ride in Bandung with all its easy breezy weather. And hey, I got tanner! :)
5. The Crown. Yes, the series. Just started watching 2 weeks ago, currently still not finished Season 1--my progress is as slow as a sloth's movements. I knew about the series for quite some time, but I was still hesitant whether to jump into the fictional Lady-Di-vs-Camilla bandwagon. Then the news about the series snatching many awards in Golden Globes broke out, I convinced myself to give it a go. Turned out it's as good as the awards proved to be. Fingers crossed I'd progress much this week--I'm so looking forward to meeting Lady Di and Camilla in Season 3 (or 4?).
6. YouTube. So, here's a thing. Pre-pandemic, I was not really into YouTube--I very rarely accessed it unless I really wanted to. Then, boom, came along the lockdown. The first five months of the pandemic, I was practically living by myself with literally nobody else under the same roof and nobody to meet and talk to beside the food delivery guys, my apartment's security guys and the cashiers at the supermarket. (Looking back, I was quite surprised how I could survive living like that for THAT long.) So, one day I started to take a peek into YouTube to fill my soul's emptiness, and before I knew it, I was hooked. Now I watch videos on YouTube almost on daily basis. Anyway, pre-1D-obsessed era, my go-to channels were history- and ghost-hunting-related (not even gonna defend myself for the latter obsession)--they were Weird History, Puppet History section in Watcher and Buzzfeed Unsolved. Some YouTube trivia fact: My comment on James Corden's Carpool Karaoke with Paul McCartney video got 386 likes (yay, Me!). If only I could write it down in my CV.. 
7. Cooking Dash, Candy Crush Saga and Interior Story. I used to mock my friends who spent money on games, but now the joke's on me since I think I've spent collectively almost IDR 1 mio by now for buying gold bars in all 3 of the games. I am OBSESSED with all 3 of them, especially Cooking Dash. I seriously needed help. But now I've successfully gained back my self-control of not spending another IDR on games. Gotta convince myself that I can still survive with only 11 gold bars in Cooking Dash.

That's all that I can think of for now. Fingers crossed I would be so committed as to update this page regularly with new (hopefully) interesting enough things in the list.

A Desperate Call to 23andMe

(Picture credit: Here)

Just last week, at the age of 29, my uncle told me that we are of Spanish/Portuguese descent from my maternal grandmother. That came of a surprise for me. Growing up, I was pretty close with my maternal grandma (I called her Oma). I remember back when I was in elementary school, she often told me stories about how his Mom and Dad met, the names of her father, mother, and grandparents, what they did for living, and stuff. I remember vividly. And I always listened to her with pure excitement--I just found it's interesting to know about the people who lived way before you. I'm not sure whether she once mentioned about our European ancestors, but what I still remember is that her Dad (a.k.a my maternal great-grandpa) worked for the Dutch and always wore suits and dress shoes every day, even at home. He was as flamboyant as that--as flamboyant as a Manadonese man who worked for the Dutch in the early 1900s could be.

When I was little, I would often ask questions to my Mom and Dad of our roots. I don't know why, but the topic always seemed to interest me. I was especially curious about my paternal side of the family, since what I always knew growing up is that we are of Chinese descent. It's even still very obvious from my facial features--the small eyes and all. But not much ever came up, other than that my paternal grandma (or Nyai as we would call her) was born in West Java as the only child and that her parents were the first generation Chinese in Indonesia. I remember I once asked my Dad which part of China they came from, and he had no idea. The curiosity probably stemmed from whenever I visited her grave, her date of birth was not written, only the month (September 1920). I also remember I asked my Dad why it wasn't written and he said none of her kids know her exact birthday. They have asked her but she never revealed her birthdate. Now that's the case for Sherlock to crack..

So, today is Chinese New Year. The year of the ox. When I was in middle school, my Dad usually took us to his uncle's house 2.5-hour drive away from our city to celebrate it with his family. His uncle is his mother's closest cousin, and probably the closest to a sibling Nyai had. Visiting his family was the closest thing I got to feel like connecting with my one of my roots. We handed out red envelopes, ate the mooncake and had all the Chinese snacks I never had (well, technically I already knew haw flakes since I was 4 or 5, but that's only it). When his uncle passed away (I guess when I was in high school), that was when the tradition stopped. We stopped visiting and only met each other once a while when there was a wedding or something. Seeing how curious myself was, I didn't quite get it why my brothers or cousins didn't seem to feel the same. Am I too obsessed with my roots? Well..

Same thing goes to my maternal side of the family. When listening to the revelation from my uncle for the first spit seconds, I was thinking "No way, my great-grandpa might be dressing like a European man back then, but that was a bit of a stretch." But then I started to connect the dots. From what I know, my great-grandpa was born and raised in North Sulawesi, which is pretty close to Moluccas (first Portuguese settlers came here) and just south of the Philippines (a Spanish colony). Also, Oma had a grey-ish eye color. I always thought that this was due to some eye conditions of the elderly, but I was wrong. My uncle (he's the firstborn) also had the same eye color, so it's a gene. So does it really mean it's true that I am of probably 6th or 7th generation Spanish/Portuguese descent? This kind of guessing game would've been much easier if only any of my family member still keeps the family tree, which my uncle said we had from both sides of the family (my Oma and Opa).

Now, going to my Opa's side of the family. My Mom often said that Opa had South Asian blood in him, and that he is of Tambi descent. I looked up where Tambi located in the map (I was guessing Bangladesh or India or even Middle Eastern), but it turned out Tambi is what the locals used to call people of Indian descent. I don't know what facial features were most distinctive of Indians back then, but what I remember vividly of Opa's facial features is that his nose was that of an Arab one. You know, a big, pointed-down one, if any of my explanation makes sense. He had tanned skin, a bit darker for Southeast Asian man, and I always thought that it was probably because he was out in the sun too much when he was in the army. Guess I was wrong and that it was also of his gene. Well..

Anyway, the thing is I really regret of not having big enough of a curiosity of my ancestry when my grandparents and Dad were still around. I wish I know who keeps the family tree my Opa kept updated. And I wish I could tell these tales to my kids one day, that they were indeed of world citizens, descendants of this and that part of the world. As for now, this might probably be the case only 23andMe could crack.

Indonesia, 1 Juni 2017

Sebagai seseorang yang lahir dari latar belakang etnis yang beragam, saya seringkali dibingungkan oleh orang-orang dengan tingkat toleransi rendah. Apalagi para chauvinis. "Etnis saya yang lebih baik" "Saya hanya mau menikah dengan orang bersuku X karena itu suku saya" "Jangan berteman dengan orang beragama Y, mereka tidak percaya konsep Ketuhanan Yang Maha Esa." Kalimat-kalimat semacam ini tidak pernah masuk logika saya.

 

Ibu saya keturunan Palembang-Manado-Jawa, ayah saya Lampung-Cina. Sejak SMP, saya bersahabat dengan orang-orang yang beragama Islam, Katolik, Buddha dan Kristen dari etnis Pribumi dan Tionghoa. Selama hamper 26 tahun saya hidup, tidak pernah sekalipun keluarga serta sahabat saya mempermasalahkan ataupun berkonflik karena latar belakang etnis maupun agama yang berbeda. Ketika Anda tumbuh besar dikelilingi dengan 'perbedaan', 'perbedaan' tersebut tidak akan terasa sebagai 'perbedaan', karena Anda menganggap bahwa itu adalah sesuatu yang wajar dan bukan suatu 'keanehan.' Dan saya yakin karena inilah Pancasila dibentuk dan dijadikan sebagai dasar negara.

Pancasila itu saling meghargai.

#SayaIndonesia. #SayaPancasila.

So, Life, What Happened?

 

(Picture courtesy of Google)

When people said something about 'quarter-life crisis', they are no shit. I am 25--the age of the said quarter-life crisis--and I am in a crisis. I used to think that it's just an excuse for people whose life is miserable cause they haven't figured anything out in their life yet. Tell you what--it's not an excuse. It's there and it's real. Boom. Now go cry in the corner of your room.

 

Here I am, in a city I never knew I'd be assigned in, 423 miles away from home. No relatives, no close friends whatsoever. For people who know what I do, they would think I got everything figured out: A job with a good pay and a steady and emotionally stable relationship. Pretty much 'everything right' a twenty-something could ask for. Yes, I can afford a plane tickets home even for once a week if I want to. Yes, I can afford the latest iPhone if I want to. But is it enough? Is it what I'm looking for? And once again, I'm embarking on a soul-searching journey..

 

When half of your close friends are married or about to get married in the next 12 months, you'll start questioning when will you be able to get everything in order and arranged like they do. It's not that I'm starting to feel peer pressure of getting hitched--I know it's a sacred stage you do once in a lifetime that you can't take back so you gotta be easy and not rush into that--it's more of when will I find out of what truly makes me happy. For them, probably marriage is what makes them happy and content, cause they believe everything will follow after. For some, marriage can wait, cause their first priority is to build a career ladder high enough for everybody to see. As for me, I don't know what truly makes me happy. Of course, someday I'll get married, have kids, settle down just like a perfect domestic life you see in the movies. But on the other hand, I feel like I haven't achieved what I'm really looking for at work. I don't like what I do. Or more like I no longer like what I do, meanwhile I need to feel content in what I do. How am I supposed to like something that no longer fills me in?

 

"You're too much of overthinker, you need to loosen up a little."

 

I do loosen up a little. Yes, I get refreshed then that's it. I still feel insecure at times. Not of who I am as an individual, but more of what I should do.

 

I always admire people who can just forget everything to do what they love to do. Or just focus on their dreams and make it happen--simply by doing what they really love to do. My boyfriend is one of those people. Of course the struggle is much more real than those whose career path is basically already paved by the company--like me. But the struggle of doing what you love is where the happiness lays, isn't it?

 

Well, I just wish I could just do anything I love, focus on it, and not have a worry or doubt in the world..

7-Step Skincare Routine

Few months ago, I've decided to pay extra attention to my skincare routine.

So, what happened?

On mid last year, I decided to ditch my usual dermatologist's skincare and opted for the generic ones. That was not an easy decision though as I had been the worshipper of my dermatologist since 2009. But then I read an article about how you should change your skincare regimen every now and then to adjust with your skin condition. And yes, I realized that my dermatologist's skincare routine no longer gave me the glow and the magic it once did to me in 2011-2012.

So I was thinking, "Maybe it's time."

It was not a walk-in-the-park journey too to find a product that really suits my skin condition. Or to be able to give the magic I hoped. Or just to simply maintain my problem-free skin. (Thankfully, I very rarely catch pimples unless it's that time of the month.)

All my life, my skin was always oily. Never had I ever catch a dry skin, let alone have dry patches. The blotting paper had always been my daily rescue—I never even had a day without one in bag! But in September—2 months after I ditched my old skincare—my skin started to dry out. Dry patches were everywhere, redness on some spots, itchings everytime I was exposed to sunlight no matter for how long, even when I felt hot (not necessarily exposed to sunlight), my skin started to itch. It got so bad that I once badly scratched my skin.

Month after month, I was always on the soul-searching journey of skincare. Some only worked for a few weeks or months, and some just failed miserably. Then finally, in March 2017, I found the right line of skincare. Finally..

So here's my current skincare routine. And the ones I've tried and worked for some time but then failed.

(Clockwise: Cetaphil Gentle Skin Cleanser, Clinique Liquid Facial Soap, Vaseline Petroleum Jelly, Laneige Moisture Balancing Emulsion, Skin Aqua UV Moisture Gel, Lush Enchanted Eye Cream, L'Occitane Shea Butter Light Comforting Cream, Thayers Witch Hazel Toner, Bioderma Sensibio Micellar Water, L'Oréal Gentle Lip and Eye Makeup Remover)

 

On daily basis, here are the skin-pampering steps I do.

 

1. Remove mascara using L'Oréal Gentle Lip and Eye Makeup Remover as I only apply mascara as eye makeup on daily basis. This one has been my holy grail since I was in college. To me, this works better than Maybelline's.

 

 

 

2. As for my face, I cleanse it using Bioderma Sensibio Micellar Water. Been using this for 6 months now and still works perfectly fine for me as I never apply heavy makeup on daily basis. Only a few pats of The Body Shop Pressed Powder and I'm all set.

 

 

 

3. Straight to wash my face using Clinique Liquid Facial Soap Mild for Dry Combination Skin, or...

 

 

 

Cetaphil Gentle Skin Cleanser. Both work well for my dry skin.

 

 

 

4. Before applying moisturizer to my skin, I apply Thayers Witch Hazel Toner which smells really good I think I'm obsessed. Also, it's alcohol and paraben-free so it's a savior to my skin as well.

 

 

 

5. While waiting the toner to set on my skin, I apply Vaseline Petroleum Jelly to my lips. Been doing this since I was 17 that I feel so sinful everytime I skip it. (Which very rarely happens.)

 

 

 

6. Then apply this jar of skin savior. My current favorite. My holy grail. L'Occitane Shea Butter Light Comforting Cream. Currently on my 3rd week of using this and my skin is just getting better and better. ~swoon~

 

 

 

7. The last step in my night skincare routine is to apply Lush Enchanted Eye Cream on the outer corner, upper eyelids and under my eyes. This is my very first eye cream since, not gonna lie, I am turning 26 this year so I think it's time to start paying attention to my eyes.

 

 

 

Meanwhile on my day skincare routine, I top it off with Skin Aqua UV Moisture Gel SPF 30 PA++ that has become my go-to sunscreen since last year.

 

 

That's it. My 7-step skincare routine. Not as elaborate and detailed as the 10-step Korean skincare one but as long as this is what works for me then I wouldn't change it anytime soon.

 

But, as I previously mentioned, some products worked only for a moment and some just failed miserably. And here are the lists.

 

1. Laneige Moisture Balancing Emulsion. You played with my heart. You only worked for a brief moment. I put my faith so much in you that I decided to purchase the full-sized one. Turns out I was wrong.. 

 

 

 

2. Muji Sensitive Skin All-In-One Essence. I bought this at a Family Mart when I was on vacation in Japan, in which I forgot to bring any of my skincare products beside facial wash. This worked fine back then in Japan as I didn't catch a dry skin despite the chilly weather. But then it all became just another hit-and-miss product once I used it back home.

 

 

 

3. Sukin Certified Organic Rosehip Oil. You are such a HUGE disappointment, or did I set my expectation way too high of you? You only worked well on my skin for 3 days. Three days. I expected much more than that but you did nothing more than being some grease on my face that makes me look dull. I'm still brokenhearted.

 

 

 

So, that was it. One thing to remember is that one product may work for me while not for the others and vice versa, but well, isn't it nice to share your thoughts with people? Because I'm a firm believer of any reviews, especially skincare, before I ever give it a go.

 

Hope this helps to anyone who ever reads this!

 

Sanity II

Where can I apply for job that is located nearby this kind of place

that everytime I feel bored I can just take a 5-mins walk to breathe in the fresh air, stare blankly at the distant view and become sane again?

 

(source: here)